The home of over 5. The Philadelphia Inquirer and Philadelphia Daily News print editions. Jenna Haze Poundforpound G. O. A. T. Yes, friends and neighbors, theres a fighter on the upcoming season of The Ultimate Fighter who has done porn and not. Get the latest Rolling Stone new music news, song and album reviews, free music downloads, artist videos pictures, playlists and more. After 25 years operating a bridal store in Fredericksburg, proprietor Mike van Bruggen sought a change of scenery. I simply want to give you the tools you need to enrich your damn lives. If for whatever reason you dont like my advice, feel free to file a formal complaint here. How To Watch The Full Stand By Me Doraemon Cartoon here. Now then, lets get on with it. Recently, I was in another city for work, so I changed my Ok. Cupid profile to that location. I was messaged by a guy well call Sam, and we started talking. Within 2. 4 hours, we had phone numbers, real names, FB profiles, etc. And at some point, naturally, he asked what part of the city I was in. Instead of just saying Oh, sorry. My bad. Just in town for work. I straight up lied and named an area in the city. I said I recently moved there for work, that I am in corporate housing so he wouldnt ask me too many questions about the neighborhood, and that I am currently on the road until Im back in the city at the end of August. And Sam, sweet Sam He just took it all for face value. Over the last three weeks we have textedtalkedchatted all day, every day, and all signs point to a serious, solid, thoughtful match. So I spent around a grand to fly down to see him, staying in a hotel, renting a carall to keep this pretense upand surprise, surprise, it was a bust. We didnt sleep together, he didnt try and kiss me, or even hold my hand. I wasnt expecting sex that night, but I was under the impression that we would have more time together. Instead, he wanted to reschedule our second date, and I pretty much flipped because, obviously, I couldnt. So we had a squabble in front of the subway station. I told him I was disappointed in him not wanting to see me, that I wasnt sure if I wanted to do this anymore. His face went red and he said I think Im going to throw up. I tried to hug him, to reassure him, and he asked me to not touch him. Then he said get home safe and disappeared into the subway tunnel. I went back to my hotel, cried, and then checked out the next morning. I waited for 6 hours at the airport before my flight Sunday morning because he didnt want to meet me. A few days later, I emailed him the truth. I wasnt expecting much of a response, but the one I got killed me. He said he does not want to continue our conversations and to not contact him ever again. He has had issues with lying exes in the past and said this falsehood is clearly an indication of my character. He recognizes that this wasnt a malicious act against him, but feels sickened knowing that I lied to create intimacy between us. So, my question is how long do I pursue this How can I tell him that this was just a stupid mistakeThat I am not his ex Or, when a 3. I just shut up and leave him alone The fact that I havent been blocked yet gives me hope that he might come around. Sincerely,Heartbroken in Seattle. Hey Heartbroken in Seattle Liar, liar, pants on fire. I think youre done here, kiddo. I know that you went through all this trouble because you felt a special connection with Sam, and that you honestly didnt mean any harm, but what you did is really tough to come back from. Its one thing to lie online about your favorite movie, your height, or even your age its just a number, right. But to fool someone into believing you live in the same city just to get closer to them is a bit dastardly. Like, thats some sociopath shit right there. Youre completely disregarding other peoples feelings to get what you want. That should bother you. Go sit in the corner and think about what you did. Now, before you put on your dunce cap and write I will not lie to people for my own personal gain a thousand times on the chalkboard, lets do a thought experiment. Say this ruse of yours didnt blow up in your face on that fateful weekendwhats the game plan then miss con artist Do you get him on the hook and then finally tell him the truth when hes in too deepHow romantic Do you move to that city for a stranger youve only chatted with for three weeks in hopes hell never find out Not creepy at all Seriously, Heartbroken, did you think this throughI can maybe understand the lie upfronthe caught you off guard and you were curious to see where things go. But you lied to this dudes face for three weeks straight You could have been honest with him at any time. Then, then, you had the audacity to be disappointed in him when he assumed rescheduling a date would be alright that it wouldnt cost you another 1,0. Sweet Sam took everything for face value because thats what you do when youre looking for love, for something realyou have to take those risks. And you threw it in his face, Heartbroken. You know, now that I think of it, maybe Sam got wise when you came to visit. Maybe thats why he didnt seem that into you, or why your second date never happened. Maybe he finally did his due diligence and looked you up. Maybe he saw that you lived somewhere else, that youd been lying to him the entire time, and maybe he hated how you didnt finally tell him the truth when you met up face to face. Perhaps he already gave you a chance to come clean. If he doesnt want you to contact him, dont. Do not pursue this. You dont need to tell him that this was a stupid mistakehe knows, thats why hes moving on. And dont tell him that youre not his ex, because at best, thats what you are now. Leave Sweet Sam alone. Who knows Maybe hell get over it and reach out to you again someday but I doubt it. And even if he does, and you guys get together, hell have a hard time ever trusting you again. Now, dust yourself off, go put on a fresh pair of pants, and try not to set those ablaze next time. Each day, we make the same choice hundreds of times whether to lie or tell the truth. It oftenRead more Thats it for this week, but I still have plenty of blunt, honest advice bottled up inside. Tell me, whats troubling you Is work getting you down Are you having problems with a friend or a coworker Is your love life going through a rough patch Do you just feel lost in life, like you have no direction Tell me, and maybe I can help. I probably wont make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but sometimes what you need is some tough love. Ask away in the comments below, or email me at the address you see at the bottom of the page please include ADVICE in the subject line. Or tweet at me with Tough. Love Also, DO NOT EMAIL ME IF YOU DONT WANT YOUR REQUEST FEATURED. I do not have time to respond to everyone just for funsies. Til next time, figure things out for yourself.